DT Year in Review: 2024

There’s no other way to put this but 2024 changed my life. And not incremental change, but transformative change.

The type of transformation where you come out the other end as a completely different person.

One that’s accompanied by a sense of awe and overzealous pride that are byproducts of the process of realising you are a new person with new perspectives and belief systems.

And I don't think it’s just me who feels this way. I know for a fact this year was a big one for many others.

Whether it was heartbreak, losing loved ones, or achieving goals one would not once imagine was possible; everyone went through some cannon event that significantly altered the way they view the world and themselves.

For me, I went from euphoric highs to diminishing lows. I started the year off travelling the world, preparing for my first marathon, starting a dream job in venture capital…. to then almost passing away, losing a close friend unexpectedly, going through my first breakup and then losing my job.

This year unearthed a version of me that I myself didn't know exist. I was at my lowest, but I chose to fight through it and by the end of it, became even stronger. And for that, I could not be more proud of myself.

If you’ve read my previous annual reflections, you’ll know I only have a few that I reflect, but given the gravitas of this year, the lessons I gained from this year were too valuable to not share.

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1. Leave the past alone

The biggest lesson I learned this year was this idea that the past makes you strong, but living in it, makes you weak.

This was much the case for the second half of my year. For those who don’t know, I almost had a cardiac arrest at my first marathon which lead to not only a DNF but also some health conditions. I ran my race in such a deficit state, being ill and yet pushing limits - aiming for a 3:45 finish which was something I publicised.

How could I expect the best outcome when I hadn’t turn up as my best self?

Adrenaline kept me going but the bottom line was I let ego took over and I paid the price.

It was a pretty scary experience, blacking out and waking up in the ambulance not having any recollection of what had happened or who I was.

Diagnosed with viral myocarditis and rhabdomyolysis, I went from being at my physical peak to barely being able to walk. It was and has been a humbling experience. I had to start from scratch and remove ego from the process. I had to deal with subtle jealousy of seeing friends complete their marathons. And I had to be okay with not being at my best.

In such a short amount of time, the world felt like it was falling apart. A close friend unexpectedly passed away, I ended my long-term long-distance relationship and I had lost my second job

But I learned quick after my marathon failure, there was no point feeling sorry for myself. Doing so has no positive outcomes. I stopped feeling sorry for myself and chose to take control of what I could change. And by the end of it, I changed the entire trajectory of my down spiral. I achieved my first 50km run and physically, Im back stronger than ever.

It sounds cliche, but the comeback is always greater than the setback.

And in my own words, the bigger pull of the catapult, the higher you’ll fly.

2. Price of failure > price of regret

As someone who hasn’t had many failures, the shock that came with my marathon DNF was a tough pill to swallow.

I showed my progress publicly to the world and I was confident that I was going to achieve my goal. And so when the exact opposite, I felt alot of shame and embarrassment.

It took me to a dark place but in it, I had to reframe the entire situation by being proud of my efforts and knowing that failure is not a reflection of myself but more so a byproduct of the conditions I was in.

If anything, looking back at my life so far, I dont think I have any regrets and that is something I can live with.

3. Your imperfections make you, you

A marathon DNF, followed by two redundancies in a year.

You’d think I’d be somewhat insecure or ashamed.

I was at the start, but I’m proud to say that this isn’t the case anymore.

And the reason why my mind has shifted, is due to embracing the Japanese philosophy of Kintsugi which is the art of repairing broken pottery by mending the areas of breakage with urushi lacquer dusted or mixed with powdered gold.

And so, wearing these failures and imperfections, I became more graceful with myself. I wore these downfalls with pride and by embracing this, I had a whole new outlook on my life.

I went from feeling sorry for myself to being grateful with all that had happened. Being so close to my own death, and grieving the passing of a loved one, I had a reference point to appreciating both the fragility and preciousness of life.

To this day, I tell myself that every day above ground is a blessing.

And it’s this mantra that has allowed me to keep perspective with everything while also ensuring theres a sense of “urgent intention” in all that I do.

4. The more time you spend thinking about the future, the less time you have to create it

While I’m on the abstract topic of time, you know that situation where you know you should be doing something but you’re not? You have a rough idea of what end state looks like but whether its imposter syndrome or fear, you can’t seem to make that leap.

And as you spend more time in this, a feeling slowly brews and takes over.

Some call it guilt, others call it inertia.

I call it being in the “liminal space”.

By definition, a liminal space is a transitional space that is neither here nor there, and is often a place of transition between one area and another.

For simplicity, it’s pretty much being in a limbo. Social media has normalised the idea of taking the time to figure it out whether that’s quitting your job or pursuing side hustles.

And while I’m all for it, as someone who has gone through two blocks of funemployment, the truth is there’s only so much time you can spend thinking about doing the work, until you realise to do the work, you have to do THE actual work.

As Chris Williamson countlessly utters, “the magic is in the work you are avoiding”.

It’s hard to explain, but you’ll get early indicators when you know when its time to get moving. You’ll become tired of reading books or listening to podcasts. You become increasingly irritable with your day job. In essence, you transition from consuming knowledge and beliefs to being ready to create/build something.

5. What doesn’t change, you choose

Having completed the enneagram test, I realised my unhealthy vices were associated with the habits of having a victim mentality. I would create illusionary prisons and wallow in my own despair.

This all changed when I stopped being a victim, and instead chose to take my life with my own hands. No excuses. No hesitances. Just diving into the deep end.

The light at the end of the tunnel saw me do things that I think I wouldn’t have been able to after the months of hell I went through. But that’s what happens when you forego the victim mentality and realise the power of change.

And so I realised that what doesnt change, you choose.

6. Life is a series of decision-making sets

A lot of life’s angst is driven by our uncertainty. And alot of uncertainty is driven by our inability to make a clear decisions. It seems to be the case that many of us are overcomplicate what we want to do but often times, its a simple binary yes/no.

So it makes sense to mitigate the stress that comes with making decisions, it’s best to do so quickly. Make a decision, quickly then move on. But easier said than done because you obviously want to do so with the right mindset and just not with sheer haste.

However, as with all things in life, this becomes easier the more you do it.

Quick decision making is a muscle in itself and one that needs to be exercised.

7. Removing ego helps you make decisions quicker

One thing that I realised that accelerates the decision making process is the removal of ego. Doing so allows you to filter the bs and focus on what really matters to you.

A prompt that has helped me navigate this has been:

“Is this [thing] for me? Or is it more for the story that I will tell the world”

Here’s a prime example I learned from this year.

From working at startups to more recently in venture capital, I’ve been conditioned to believe that this one thing for me, was to be a part of some sort of tech product either as an operator or a founder myself, that could then be scalable. And then ultimately, have an exit plan like through an acquisition.

In the midst of it all, I’ve also been pursuing my creative passions but within set parameters.

Parameters being — that these creative pursuits are only to be done on the side. Because I had told myself that unlike building a product, these creative pursuits aren’t scalable and I’d be limited by how many hours I put into these offerings.

I had told myself that if it wasn’t part of a 5-10 year plan, then why bother pursue it. Having been surrounded by countless tech founders and investors, my environment has funnelled me into perceiving success being masqueraded by the idea of tech global expansions and acquisitions.

I would enjoy my weekdays romanticising over the idea of building this tech startup. To the moon, Id say. And then the weekend would come where I followed the adrenaline that came from capturing that sunrise with my photography.

I wanted the best of both worlds, and unfortunately I was unable to achieve either.

And I felt guilty knowing well and truly that the best things in life comes when you double down on that one thing. There’s no such thing as having your talents or even focus spread thin.

Running an agency-model business was something I never thought I’d do. I gave myself a lot of resistance because my environment and circles of influence made me fixated on tech startups.

But fast forward, here I am doing just that — building out my own creative studio. And the best part about it all, is that I actually enjoy it which begs me to think, perhaps the attraction towards tech startups was driven by ego.

8. Don’t worry about outcomes, just focus on first-principles

This lessons come off the back of realising how ego can distort your perception and clarity on what you want in your life.

It sounds a bit of a duh comment, but focus on what you truly value.

While it’s important to explore and dabble in multiple projects, you don’t want to be caught up in an endless cycle of experimenting.

There comes a certain point of time when you need to double down.

By figuring out your first-principles, it becomes clear with what you achieve because values drive your why. And your why is timeless. It’s your why that ensures you’re not being pulled from every second shiny object.

9. Build the plane while it's in the air

When it comes to figuring out that thing, I think alot of us can concede that we don’t know what the answer is.

And because we don’t know what that is, we do our best to try make these polished plans. We tell ourselves until we know how, then we shouldn’t start.

Frankly, these plans and strategies are masqueraded as things we do just to feel good about ourselves. In reality, this is not doing the work and the only way to “figure it out” is to just start. No matter how scrappy or unsure you are. And then as you go, you can progressively improve.

Slow motion is better than no motion.

10. What is true will find its way

I’ve been a big believer in this and though I’ve yet seen the full fruition, I’ve gotten to see teasers - both vicariously through peers and in my personal life.

Ever since I took the leap of faith to run my own creative studio, it seems to be the case that things have been (relatively) easier.

Meeting like-minded people. Business opportunities presenting themselves. Finding creative inspiration through the physical world.

I say easy because as of late, it feels like these moments have come to me without me having to relentlessly chase. They feel seamless. They feel natural.

And deep down I believe its because I am operating at my most authentic self and following what is true to me.

“The universe will conspire to help you get what you want, when you decide to focus.”

11. To be human, is to control

This thought occurred to me during the moments right before my big 50km run. Without getting into too much detail, this run was meant to be a way to close the narrative on my marathon DNF. To end the year on a high and to also instil a mantra for the upcoming year of “I’m not sure how I’m going to do this, but I’m going to find a way no matter what.”

But deeper than this was the idea that the run was going to be an outlet for me to control the hurt I was about to endure.

Having been hurt by things that I couldn’t control this year, there was a desire to lean into something that was going to hurt (a lot). But at least with this, I now have the opportunity to take it head on — do I want the pain to consume me, or do I want to control the pain?

And it was this moment, that lead me to realise a big part of human existence is feel control and take both hands when we are given the opportunity to do so.

12. What's the point of planting flowers if you don’t stop to smell them

To finish off my mega list of lessons, something I need to say is while achieving big milestones, it’s important to remember that at the end of the day, it’s all not that serious.

And that’s not me being complacent.

As someone who almost passed away and had someone he loved gone from this world too early, I can say that when the dust settles, we can sometimes find ourselves overindexing on achievements, and undervaluing the smaller things

I think its important to be committed with our pursuits no matter how big or small, but we should never let the obsession consume you.

Because at the end of the day, what’s good in all these wins, if we don’t stop and smile?

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To all those who’ve dealt with their own tribulations this year, be proud of yourself for making it to the other side. Be kind to yourself and give yourself grace. Let the easy days be easy, and the hard days, be hard. Remember that sometimes you need to get broken down, to be rebuilt back up.